St. George

The last few weeks before Jonathan passed stick out in my mind the most out of the whole 15 months we were married. I don't know if that is because I cherish those last few moments spent together or if some of it has to do with the regret I have, wishing I had done things different, said things different, etc. Regardless, those first few weeks of September 2005 stick out in my mind the most. I can remember conversations and a lot of things we did.
One of those things that sticks out in my mind was the girls weekend I spent in St. George with my sister and Jonathan's sisters. We really did have a lot of fun! Jonathan's older sister had just moved down there to start a new job, and so his other sister planned a girls weekend for us all to go down and visit her and we took my little sister with us. We had fun shopping for a Homecoming dress for my sister, we went to the Shedaisy concert, and Jonathan's oldest sister spoiled me by paying for most everything because she knew I was a poor married college student.
This may sound a little funny to most, but I think it was all part of the Lord preparing me for what was to happen in just a few short weeks. I really did have a lot of fun on this trip, but I missed Jonathan terribly! I thought about him the entire time we were in St. George and just prayed that he would be safe while I was gone, I literally thought in my mind please do not let him die this weekend while I am away. I can't handle that! I was so excited when we were finally headed home so that I could see him. I think part of the reason I hated being away from him was because of the feelings I had been having of him dying soon, I hated being away from him. I felt like if we were together nothing could happen to him because I could protect him, or so that was my thinking in my young immature mind. Hurricane Katrina had just hit New Orleans right before we took this girls trip to St. George and for some reason I could not stop thinking about it while we were there and how sad it was, and all the people that lost their lives and what their families must be going through. As sad as this is to say, it was probably one of the first times I felt a little bit of sympathy for someone for going through such a tragedy. The Lord was gradually breaking my hard heart down because he knew I needed it!